I've been thinking tonight about my future. I know, I'm so responsible. Mostly I've been thinking about what the heck I'm going to do for a job after graduation. I mean there is always B&N. (And for those of you who work/have worked there, don't dump on me for it--I actually really like working at a bookstore and wouldn't mind working there full time. Not forever unless I became a manager and got paid well, but at least for a time). But I did a little research tonight on job sites and have come to the conclusion that I probably shouldn't look for a job until next semester. Every job looks like it needs to be filled soon, and I obviously can't go back home without completing my degree first. Plus I feel like I don't have the necessary experience to actually do anything professional. I mean, I've had a couple of internships, but I feel like I didn't really do anything that will land me a real job that I'm comfortable doing, or think I can do well. All I know is that I'm pretty good with customer service at B&N; I have a very good knowledge of books, especially children's books; I'm a decent writer; and I'm really good at proofreading. But who needs a proofreader nowadays? No one cares about that stuff anymore.
And then there's the whole grad school dilemma. Will I be able to afford going to a private institution for another couple of years full time? Am I willing to go part time and hope to find a job that will help pay for it but complete my programs in 3 or 4 years? It's all confusing for me right now.
So I guess what this whole self-doubt and insecurity thing boils down to is: what can I do? Will I be able to find something that I will at least like doing? What do you all think (all three of you that read this)?
Spending time looking for jobs and worrying about my future has led me to procrastinate horribly with this children's book I'm supposed to be writing. Ah, the paradox of schoolwork and job hunting.